Garuda falls flat

I tried to see I-Fak last night, but was turned away at my local Major Cineplex branch by the lack of subtitles. So rather than see anything else, I went home. The other choices were Adam Sandler's 50 First Dates or Garuda (which oddly offered English subtitles). The Sandler I could've probably gotten into, but I wasn't sure about Garuda. Reading the review by Kong Rithdee in today's Bangkok Post made me feel a bit better about my decision.

At best, this idiotic monster-unleashed pic has the dramatic integrity of a PlayStation role-playing game. That means the digitally-drawn monster ends up giving a better performance than the human actors, who're maddeningly cold and inanimate, while the sci-fi setting is a childish farce.

Paksa Wayu [Garuda] takes pride in claiming that it is the first Thai movie to be shot entirely on high-definition digital video (HD), the kind that did the job for George Lucas in his new Star Wars trilogy. But that technological prestige just cannot redeem this whole mess from both its sloppiness and poor taste.

Of course, the HD camera will soon open up a new horizon for local film-makers. It's cheaper, faster to work with, gives freedom to shoot longer takes, and ideal with heavy CG touch-up; many film-makers even believe that the HD will eventually replace traditional, clumsy movie camera whose fundamental functions have hardly been altered since the Lumiere brothers invented it over a century ago. That vision will be realised only when theatres are equipped with digital projectors; as of now, the digital footage of a movie shot with HD will have to be transferred back into rolls of film to be screened through a light bulb in the classical way.

Unfortunately, the HD issue is beside the point here because no matter what the medium is, Garuda is fundamentally a bummer. It's a monster movie that's seems eager to be unoriginal, to be a loyal copycat of Hollywood prototypes -- the obvious reference is the dragon flick Reign of Fire. Its few smartly-staged action sequences are not a consolation, but an emphasis on how amateurish the whole enterprise is.

One innovation is the timely use of the new Bangkok subway as an arena of disaster. But I don't grasp how the beast, the bird-god Garuda, has scurried its way to hibernate under our city in the first place; the film opts for a sci-fi mode, not the mythological mode, even though the Garuda acquires an honourable position in this society as an emblem of the Royal Thai government. Anyway, a pretty archeologist (Sarah Ledge) is called up to investigate the ancient beast believed to be sleeping, whereas a special military task force, led by the constipated lieutenant (Sornram Theppitak), is hell-bent on using their magically-blessed weapons to annihilate all mentally sick birds, sacred or profane.

The rest goes by the book. The Garuda wakes up and starts stalking and killing the young soldiers, all of them exhibiting boy-band hairstyles and the line-reading that was cool 15 years ago in bad American teenager's flicks -- and making me so happy when the actors are crushed by those giant feet.

Meanwhile, upholding the tradition of a animal-loving heroine in all monster movies, the sensitive archaeologist tries to prevent the use of force and eventually offers herself as bait to lure the creature in a final showdown in front of MBK Centre -- adhering to another Hollywood code that the destruction is more tantalising with the backdrop of a metropolitan landmark.

Groomed to be the showpiece, the CG-animated Garuda has a slick visual texture, a funny proportion, and not a distinguishable personality. The Garuda in the local myth is a corpulent, sarong-wearing, fearsome ornith angel with a look that also suggests a wry sense of humour. In the movie the creature is a big clumsy bird influenced by Western monsters, a localised version of a shrieking, rampaging dragon (and in some close-up shots it looks like a frightened chicken).

To be fair, however, it's not a bad CG job at all, and the climactic setup at Pathumwan intersection has a few startling shots. But is that all the movie wants to achieve? Special-effects are never a strength of Thai cinema, and never will be. The idea of making a movie that shows off eye-popping effects is valid as a technical exercise, though we all know we can't dream of matching the level of even a poor Hollywood sci-fi. And even if we do in the future, movie-making -- good movie-making -- requires the firm pillars of story-telling and cultural relevance. Paksa Wayu has neither of these. It's an albatross -- a big awkward bird that can only dream of flying.

(Via Bangkok Post, RealTime, Page 7, April 2, 2004)